Effective Communication with Seniors

Have you ever been in a situation when you hear someone talking to an aging adult and you cringe at their interaction? You hear them refer to the senior as “sweetie”, or their back is turned to them when speaking and instead of turning around to speak directly they end up shouting.

Let’s break down elderspeak. According to griswaldhomecare.com: elderspeak occurs while talking to an aging adult in high pitched sing-song tone, shouting, using overly endearing terms such as “honey” or “dear”. It can also using simpler words and speaking more slowly.  These tactics can come across as condescending, belittling and overall disrespectful.

Instead, be mindful of your surroundings, are you in a relaxed environment? Are there many interruptions around you? Are you giving your full attention and speaking directly? It may also be helpful to stay on one subject and trying not to interrupt them.

Verywellhealth refers to elderspeak as a negative movement. They say it contributes to depersonalization, making your interactions with the individual un-unique. Verywellhealth also mentions that elderspeak implies power. Using those high-pitched tones or even your demeanor when interacting can make them feel helpless and childlike.  There have been multiple studies that show elderspeak can result in “challenging behaviors” i.e. agitation or loud or unexpected over-reaction.  These would stem from decrease self-esteem, withdrawals, and depression.

We need to realize how valuable seniors are. The history they hold and the experiences they keep are treasures that many would enjoy sharing if one had the thought to ask questions.  Open ended questions are great to start a conversation. Don’t be afraid to ask questions about the future as well as the past. What are their families doing for the summer, what trips would they like to go on? There may be a point in a conversation where there will be a difference of opinion. It is okay to disagree.  

Aging does not mean they are dumb ~ these are successful, experienced and hard-working people who have the right to be interacted with respect. We can avoid elderspeak by concentrating on an individual’s strengths, keeping in mind that no matter how much one declines they are still an adult.  A good rule of thumb is to treat others the way you would want to be treated.